How To Win Friends & NOT Be Influenced By People

How To Win Friends & NOT Be Influenced By People

I got up this morning an turned on the old boob tube. The story that was running was about Facebook and how, you know it's all their fault “the russians” took over influencing the elections. Or that's how the story keeps coming across on major network TV to me. An I was kinda disgusted. Not with Facebook: But major TV media. They have an obligation to report stories. I get that but do they know how that is coming across to anyone remotely tech savvy? Which is the vast majority these days. Since we raised our children on it. Or maybe it doesn't... an it's just me but I tend to see it as bullying.
Huh?
Let's go back, before TV there was radio. It majorly influenced people.
It use to be the source you would go to. Get your news, most of it more localized. Before that all you had was newspapers. An if you didn't have that cause of being so rural, I guess you had the local town gossiper. Each had influence. Newspapers, radio then TV. Each grew from local, to major national influence. An each had it's “time” period where it was more of a influence then the other. All three of them managed to coexist. But most of the time, in my generations opinion they all kinda said the same things.
An the eighties generation: Mine.
We kinda got sick of being force feed what to think about what was going on. Then came cable, because there was a demand for it. My generation in particularly wanted to hear “what was happening” an different views on it. We didn't always want to have to be “politically” correct. In fact, a lot of us grew up on shows that explored that. It was our family time, sitting around watching shows: That challenged view points, stereotypes an previous generations stances on things. It taught my generation to question the authority of the powers that be. Why?
A lot because TV was challenging the old powers themselves.
But somewhere along the way, major TV networks seemed to stop doing that. They where the “head honcho” now. An to me, A lot of it became “fluff”. Mainstream. I never once watched what was suppose to be so popular to my generation: Miami Vice. An I hated what was playing on my local radio stations, with the exception of one that played rock but didn't or couldn't play anything new. It went under even trying to. The newspaper only seemed good for the comics to me. I wanted something different then mainstream. Things that challenged what was becoming the “status quo”. An why would I want to pick up three different things, all telling me the same thing? I wanted to learn new things. Hear new things. Make up my own mind about things. Not just follow three difference sources all pushing “popular” on me.
It was only popular because it was the only choices.
An what I liked to listen to, hear about, learn about was being bullied an kept off those sources. Or on so late I wasn't allowed to watch it: Like Saturday Nite Live. Then cable came along. It's why MTV became so popular: Suddenly I could listen to Van Halen. I could watch Motley Crue. I didn't have to listen to mainstream music. I could listen to what I wanted. I could watch debates on different points of views: like Phil Doungue all day long if I wanted to. I could finally watch different lifestyles an just laugh at yuppies an myself being young poor an struggling to survive. An if “mainstream” media wasn't my thing, I could get 300+ channels that might have something on it that suited me.
It was too much, an not enough --- Influence.
A quality me and my generation an ever generation after us has been dealing with since. Call us the generation that sorts through garbage if you want. Cause we are. We will sort through those channels to find something worth watching, listening to an hearing about. Or at least we use to. Just like the TV generation that got tired of the older radio/newspaper generation, ours is kinda take all three with a grain of salt.
The “PARTY” generation low an behold likes to learn.
An here comes the internet. A breath of fresh air for a lot of us. Cause If I'm gonna sort through a bunch of garbage, I might as well be learning something right? An that's exactly what I did through the 90's as an adult. Turned off the TV. Never bought a newspaper, an until the X & JJO came out I wouldn't even turn on the radio much. It wasn't until the 2000's I started hearing anything on it I'd like to listen to. An a lot of it's angry. You know why? Our generation kinda feed up with it all. That is why a lot of us turned to the internet in the first place.
Some place to go to follow those dreams. Learn.
An it's why Facebook became popular in the first place. Cause guess what? No one wants to get stuck learning from a dummy. Follow the smart people. It's what drew so many of us to it in the first place. An the masses followed. It's how it, Google an others became so popular to begin with. My generation is burnt out on “dumb”. Or at least I am. I migrated over to here as soon as I started seeing all the dumb on MySpace. Bad programming, bad blogs, stupidity, poor marketing. As soon as the garbage shows up, I an others like me leave. Cause I'm done shifting through it. Garbage.
An anyone with any common sense is too.
Which will get me to the point of this rant: the “russian” influence or whatever you want to call it has been on the internet all along. The anti America, it's all one big conspiracy thing has been around since Y2k. It's not Facebooks fault people are paranoid. Or that they have listened to “influencers” over the past decade or two who spout the end of the world is coming. These type people have been on the internet all along. Our whole generation, was taught to question, specially authority by a 70's generation. An most of us with any smarts, have taken the time to listen at least once to the different opinions or history spouted on the internet. It's where tea partiers came from sorta. People sorting through the Y2K propaganda and scare.
There are people on the internet, that started listening to that extreme “the whole sky is going to fall in chicken little stuff” that are crazy now. I've watch it over the course of decades. You take a generation that grew up feeling they where being told what to think, read, listen to, an watch, your bound to get a few that will listen to doom dayers. Trust me, I'm living with one that is exactly like that. It's all a lie he says. An he is a lot like that cause of the influence the internet has had on him. To me, he's a former coke head that ruined his life that wants to believe it's the government or anyone else fault but his own he's in the pickle he is at age sixty. He's so paranoid the whole world is out to “get us” that he won't even get on Facebook. An going through the 80s and 90s since you could be arrested for just smoking pot has churned out a lot of not so big on our government type people.
Which isn't Facebooks fault either.
It's a social platform. All types are going to be on it. Just like in the olden days of the internet. TV. Radio. Newspapers and Magazines. You have to sort out, who your going to listen to an who your not. Something my generation should be very use to. The problem is, influence itself. Big media is so use to having it: Influence. They forget they didn't always have it. Radio did.
An they don't have the grip they use to. Not that they really did. They just thought it was bigger then it was until they had a little competition. Because it--influence-- really lies in the people. Not the media. An as much as medias would like to control people like that they don't. You can't make someone watch TV. You can't make some listen to music they don't like. An you can't make someone read a bias newspaper. You can't MAKE someone respond to an AD. People respond to people.
They either like you, or they don't. Sometimes both.
An there's been plenty of people on the internet along the way at first I liked. Just like in real life, until I got to know them a little better. Then I backed off finding out they where a little to this or a little to that. Sometimes going as far to meet them in real life to find out they where nothing I'd get a long with in real life. Just like actors, artist or musicians. They might have some influence but not for long if I can't respect what they are about. Bitching about problems in our country is one thing, wanting to destroy it is another. An MOST Americans are not going to be influence by one pretending to be American for very long. I share artwork, techniques an knowledge about photography but it's RARE I've ever had a political discussion with anyone from a foreign land. Once, that I can think of an he was Australian. An at best, he just shared how his country an fellow men typically view Americans in general.
But back to the point, the last decade or so: most internet users have been anonymous. AOL ran this way. Most internet sites learned early on to protect their identities making them private. Facebook was the first to ask us to put out in the open who you really are. An what's happening now, is it's finally coming out who's been spoofing popular social medias for some time because of that. That's not Facebooks fault. It shouldn't be a surprise to anyone that's had to sort through garbage most of their life that there are people on the internet just like in real life you don't want influencing you.
To me that's common sense.
Call it a personal responsibility our generations had to bear since we where little like no other generations before us. An hopefully we have taught our own children to be careful of who they let influence them. Not everyone has a our best interest at heart. Let alone our country. We teach our children about this when they make friends right off the bat in grade school. Not everyone is going to be our friends. An even some of our “friends” really aren't. So why is Facebook being held accountable for a fact that just is when it comes to socializing?
It's not something you can change about living in a society. Any society.
You can influence someone. Big Media knows this, Hell, it was a book in the 70s: How To Win and Influence people by Dale Cartigene. I might even have a copy. LOL But you can't for long if you are not who you say you are. So this whole, nail Facebook to the cross thing is going to backfire on the people blaming them. They are just a platform for society to be on. They are not society. Nor are they responsible for what has been a internet flaw for over a decade at least: personal accountability. Pay attention to who you let influence you. Should you be? Are you being influenced in ways you had not thought about before? As far as who and what you let in your newsfeed on Facebook. Is grandma Salley really “bad” to be friends with? Or is my friend Joe, somehow harming me accidentally on social media without meaning to?
Facebook offers a free speech venue.
An as an American we should all be supporting anyone's right to say whatever the hell they want. Even if we don't like or agree with it. We can hear them but we don't have to listen or be influenced by them. It's our choice who we choose to listen to. Not Facebooks, Googles, the Internet, TV, Radio, Newspapers or Magazines. It's our choice who we let influence our thoughts. Our life.
An that's really what major Media is upset about. Why they are attacking Facebook. Or at least that's they way they always come across to me reporting a story about a tech company.
They don't have the choice. They have to report the stories, but they always seem to be on a rant about what a internet company is doing “wrong” The internet isn't regulated by the FFC folks. People can say an do what they want on it, as long as they aren't breaking into their neighbors computer. TV doesn't have the influence they once did. It's a fact.
The people have to choose thier source of information, even “influence. All anyone can do ethically is teach others to be careful who you let influence you. An that includes all those anonymous pages that run across your news feeds on Facebook each day. Or Google feeds.
I personally deleted all the people I had on Facebook once. I had over 1200 followers. My “influence” was about 50 percent reach in my local area. Call it paranoid, but I didn't like my feed. I didn't like what I was looking at ever day on Facebook. I deleted everyone but my three kids in fact because I didn't want to be influenced that way. I had only liked a few pages. But others on my feed, liked a lot of these anonymous pages. An some of them are funny, cute an inspiring. Others are just trash taking up my time an mind space. An it ANNOYED me all the trash everyone was sharing.
I didn't care how much “clout” (lol it's a site that measures your “influence” in social media) I had.
I cared about what I saw going on. The influence these pages where having on people an now me having to stare at what they where sharing. An some of it was “out there”. So, I left all “my people” on Google+ an deleted everyone on my Facebook profile. I just kept the 500 or so on my page. An you know what? I don't have to look at that negative garbage every day anymore. I can see PEOPLES post. An a few select pages that I don't mind influencing me or sharing. What I can see is what's influencing my kids. An that's what matters the most to me. I plan to have a talk with each one of them about it. Again. An again.
Cause if you pick up on a bunch of junk, that may seem funny at first: An I do think Rebel Circus is funny. It can influence you if you let it into a depressed state of mind if you see 50+ negative things every time you look at your feed. Pages like that are nice to share some, but if that's all you do: It's gonna depress you. An I seen plenty of people who did share that stuff all day long. I could myself. But here's the thing:
They are asking Facebook to monitor free speech.
An it's wrong. People have to monitor themselves. Not only in what they do & say, but who they choose to follow.
All TV, Newspapers an other media should be doing is reminding of us of that. Not ganging up on Facebook or other social platforms because they are a threat to their influence. All social media did is give a “channel” to everyone. It's up to everyone else whether they want to listen “your channel”.
An the one thing you can't stop is stupid people.
So educate others or give a genital reminder about being careful about the influences in your life. Teach them about how tailored feeds are. How they can impact your metal health. How they can become one sided, an unhealthy. Let the public know, Just like too much TV is unhealthy, so can be the internet or anything that you let influence you too much in a way that's not good for you. Speak of the dangers of having such a narrow targeted feed on social medias. But don't blame the platform. It's not the TVs fault a show isn't any good. It's the people behind it. It's not Facebooks fault as a platform that part of society will always show a ugly side. It's people. It wasn't AOL fault people used it to have affairs.
Facebook can't control people.
All they can do is educate people on how to avoid the pitfalls of using social media. An TV can do the same. But what TV should not be doing is saying Facebook is guilty of influencing a election. Otherwise, TV is just as guilty. Cause there is bias on it. LOL Just watch The View! Ha! People are always going to have opinions. People are always going to influence other people.
It's up to us personally if we want to just hear them, or listen to them. A big difference! But I'm not really going to watch TV bully the Internet. Or endorse Facebook should be monitoring free speech.
It's not their jobs. If they do. People will just move to a different platform. An that's all the Internet, Cable, TV, radio, newspapers and media are. Platforms. The only reason the internet is different: Is it's given a “channel” to everyone.
An there is a lot of “garbage” on it.
But saying Facebook is responsible to monitor people is a little bit too “Big Brother” to me. It's a little too FFC to me. Stepping into trying to regulate free speech. They don't have to provide a platform at all if they don't want to. The guys rich, an can just shut it down if he wants to. An go away much like AOL did. But another platform will pop up just like it did to network the masses together. Its human nature to socialize. An you can't FFC the activity of mixing socially with others. All you can do is teach others how to behave in a way that is acceptable to society.
And that technically isn't Facebook's “job”. It's just a platform more can get on then other medias. Seems like a job more for schools & parents: Socializing your kids. So educate. Inform but let's not blame. Its just how society is: A mixed bag of influences... teach people how they could be influenced by it without really being aware of it. Most get it, but if you don’t reevaluate it. Your feeds. Are you seeing what uplifts you? Or is it just a depressing an one sided? Feeds are so tailored, you could be being influenced by that alone. So think of it as food for thought. Is what your feeding your mind healthy?